Holiday Adult SexToy Novelty Items
WARNING: If you still believe in Santa, the following may be a shattering of some childhood images for you.
Still reading? Looking for a slightly off-color, deliciously humorous gift? The following novelty items are too racy for viewing by Santa's elves, but Ashley and her helpers are happy to make them available to you:
- Santa Vibe: A special recommendation from Mrs. Claus to the ladies. Mrs. Claus personally indulges herself with this item, when Santa is missing in action, engrossed in his toy factories or sledding off on a business trip. A well-priced stocking stuffer for all your female friends.
- Wind Up Santa: Santa is home from delivering toys, and looking for Mrs. Claus with visions of more than sugar plums dancing in his head.
- Santa and Girlfriend Wind Up Toy: Santa truly is a resourceful fellow. He manages to deliver presents to everyone in the world all in one night, and still finds time to take a detour for a piece of Christmas cheer on the side. Poor Mrs. Claus!
- Wind Up Strokin' Santa: Apparently Mrs. Claus has reindeer spies keeping tabs on Sata during his Christmas voyage. The North Pole can get pretty cold and lonely for Santa when Mrs. Claus is upset with him.
- Jerk Off Santa: Boy, Mrs. Claus holds a grudge, doesn't she?
- Wind Up Flashing Santa: When you least expect it--a quick glimpse of Santa's skivvies! He'd better watch out or that bowl full of jelly belly of his is going to get frostbite. Has Santa lost it completely? Mrs. Claus needs to save him from himself.
- Mrs. Claus and her Candy Cane: Mrs. Claus naked! She's smoking more than any Christmas chimney. See her take matters into her own hands with a candy cane. From our prior glimpes of Santa's corn cob pipe however, she's sure to miss the real thing sooner or later. Lets hope the two of them patch things up and make some sweet Christmas music together soon!
Funny and Useful to Boot
- Sexy Santa Mug: What better way to sip a cup of hot cocoa than with a view of Santa's well-hung physique visible with every sip? Top off your cocoa with a squirt of whipped cream...yummy!
- Flashing Pecker Santa Hat: Christmas socks are so tacky...it's warm, it's a penis, and it lights up...what more can you ask for?
- Santa Pecker Pen; Mrs. Clause Stripper Pen: Writing out thank you notes can get so tedious. Make it more fun with one of these pens.
- Sexy Santa Candle: A must have for every candle collector...or reason enough to start a collection. Santa in all his glory-it's almost too cute to burn.
Santa and Mrs. Claus, you've got to love them. Though they put on a squeaky clean image for the kids, Ashely was able to catch an exclusive glimpse into behind the scenes at the North Pole. Ho ho ho and Merry Christmas!